Finland and Greece: A better deal

This week Finland was headline news around Europe because of the additional negotiations regarding their multi billion Euro participation in the Greece bailout deal.

Now obviously the Finns have shown a damn lot more financial intelligence than the rest of the European governments combined by actually demanding collateral before dumping their money into a bottomless pit like the Greek economy. The way they went about it was not the smartest though.

Now obviously Greece is a country full of law abiding, hard working people, who are among the most honest in the world, have a culture that despises corruption and deceit and are totally not to blame for their financial misery. They just have a small temporary cash flow problem that needs to be resolved with a loan.

But lending out money and then asking for almost the same amount in collateral in a frozen bank account doesn’t really solve their problem, now does it? And on top of that, even when Finland does get this collateral deal, all the other European countries will want the same and we will all be back to square one.

What Finland should have done is demand the islands of Santorini and Mykonos as collateral. When Greece eventually files for bankruptcy these islands will then automatically become part of Finland’s territory. And until that time all Finnish residents should be made be eligible for 75% discounts on hotel rooms, apartments, restaurants and car rentals plus free beach chairs. Furthermore Greek males are no longer allowed to harass Finnish female visitors anywhere on the island at any time. Oh and all Finnish residents get unlimited free access to Cavo Paradiso of course.

Voila: a much better deal and Finnish tax payers’ money put to good use. And since Greece is hip deep in islands this deal is easily replicated towards other EU countries as well, so there will be no opposition like there is against the current plan. Just part out the rest of the country in collateral to all the other bailout fund participants, and when in the end of the day Greece eventually does go bankrupt the entire problem is solved automatically. Greece will simply no longer exist and the rest of Europe will have their own little vacation paradises. Bought and paid for.

Tooth fairy

I'm the tooth fairy
I came for your teeth

- I heard that I get to keep them, from my lawyer

Well, my lawyer told me to come down here because
I'm the tooth fairy and I take your teeth okay?

- Okay well how 'bout, ehm...

Look, just gimme your damn teeth okay?
And then I'll go, okay?

- I can't, neh I'm not gonna do it

Gimme your damn teeth, that's it
I'm gonna take your teeth and them I'm gonna go
And ehm, you'll hear from my lawyer tomorrow otherwise
And ehm, I don't think you wanna meet my lawyer

- I think you don't wanna meet my lawyer

I think you don't wanna meet MY lawyer

- I think you're a cheap ho

Armin clothing line surprises customers

People from around the globe are reporting various unexpected side effects from wearing products out of Armin van Buuren’s new clothing and shoes line.

The main concern appears to be connected to the upper torso products like jackets and shirts. Early customers say that that wearing these products make them extend their arms horizontally and getting stuck in that position. Jochim Struss, a 21 year old taxi driver from Hamburg Germany, reported that ever since he started wearing his new Armin jacket he has not been able to get his arms down, which is causing him some serious challenges in performing his job. "I can leave the driver window of my car open to stick my left arm out and I can steer with my knees, so that is not the biggest problem. But passengers in the right front seat are not very comfortable with my right arm being right in front of them. A female passenger even accused me of trying to touch her private parts and got out of my cab before we even drove off! I’m afraid I’m gonna lose some income over this, but I don’t wanna let go of my precious Armin jacket. He’s the number one you know, and I read on the interweb that he said himself that these clothes fit with his way of life and that he can really identify himself with them. So I just have to have them.”

32 Year old Juan del Peseta from Rio del Plaja reports a similar problem with his stylish new Armin polo shirts. “I tend to sweat a lot, so I bought seven polo shirts so I can change them during the day and stay fresh. But I haven’t been able to wear more than one because as soon as I put it on my arms have extended which has basically made it impossible to take it off. As such I don’t mind, you know because it’s Armin’s stuff and he said that he can really identify with it, but after a few days the armpits have gotten really smelly. I really can’t go into my shower anymore because it’s not wide enough so I think I’m just gonna go to the beach and walk into the water with it. I’m sure the girls on the beach are gonna go crazy over me because I wear such a cool Armin product.” When asked if he was going to return the other 6 shirts Juan replied he wasn’t. “I’m just gonna keep wearing this one till it wears out and then have someone cut it off me and start wearing the next one. It’s gonna be a great summer!”

Not only the shirts and jackets seem to be causing unexpected side effects, wearing the Armin shoes reportedly causes the owner to jump up and down uncontrollably at random moments. Sandy Ploofings, a brain surgeon from New Zealand, reports considering a career change. “I absolutely love my Armin shoes. I mean especially since he said that he really can identify with them and stuff. Plus they are really comfortable and supportive, but yeah they do make me jump up and down at them most unexpected moments. First time it happened was when I was in the supermarket waiting in the cashiers line. People thought I was being impatient, but I just couldn’t help myself. The bad thing though is that this also happens randomly when I’m performing surgery and that obviously is not very practical. I guess I’m gonna have to give up my career and do something else, because Armin means everything to me and not being able to wear his shoes would just make me miserable.”

Upcoming DJ Cheese Frankfurt from the Netherlands is one of the few customers who is actually really pleased with the side effects of the new Armin shoes. Frankfurt: “A few years ago I bought a set of Tiësto sneakers, because I was convinced they would make me a better DJ and help me progress my international career. But I have still never played outside my home town of Lutjebroek and even there people are not exactly showing up in big numbers for my sets. Now with these Armin shoes I feel I can be just as successful as Armin because they make jumping up and down on stage a lot easier. I finally understand why it never worked out with my Tiësto shoes. They must have been broken from the start.”

A spokesperson of Quick Sports International was rather surprised by all the mayhem their new products seems to be causing. “These clothes were designed in close collaboration with Armin himself. He really wanted them to fit his way of life and be able to identify himself with them. In fact Armin himself was used as a model for the initial design patterns. So I don’t find it very surprising that our designers tried to incorporate some of his trademark moves into the line. As a matter of fact, we are currently planning a line of Armin branded headphones that are made of extremely light fibers, so they are easy on the shoulders while they force you to hold them up in the air constantly.” When asked if people are allowed to return the articles for a refund if they become too annoyed by the side effects he answered: “We will consider that, if they haven’t sweated too much in them.”

A random day at the ID&T headquarters

Employee 1: Hey check this out, I just managed to book Tiesto for Trance Energy 2011, how cool is that?!

Employee 2: Tiesto? Dude he doesn't do trance anymore, he has completely converted to house and shitty hitparade music.

Employee 1: Really?? Tiesto? Damn I didn't know that.

Employee 2: Can you still cancel the booking?

Employee 1: No, I got an extra good rate by taking the no-cancellation option. Only 200.000 euro instead of 250.000.

Manager: You know what guys, we can easily solve this by changing the concept of the event. Let's just axe the trance and call it 'Energy'. Then we can get away with whatever shit lineup we want. I'll talk to Duncan about it.

Duncan: Hmzzz... Trance Energy without trance eh? Brilliant idea! Go make it happen and stop by at Personnel on your way out, you're getting a raise.

Review: Gareth Emery - Northern lights

Gareth Emery is probably the single most successful one of the new generation of DJs that have rushed into the spotlights in the past few years. After he skyrocketed into the DJ Mag Top 100 in 2009 his schedule has completely exploded and today he is one of the most sought after names around the globe. It’s hard to imagine that this is the same guy we were hanging out with in the crowd at Tomorrowland only a few years ago, eating an ice cream and not being bothered by anyone.

What’s even more remarkable is that Gareth did it all on his own. He runs his own label and is not on the massive promo waves of companies like Armada, who in todays market full of ignorant consumers can make any talentless noone into a star DJ. Boosting his popularity by his early adoption of the Podcast phenomenon and a stream of quality productions and remixes, all laced with his very unique signature sound, him being embraced by the global audience is proof that there really is a place for real telent, next to the Tiestos, Armins and Paul van Dyks of this world.

Perhaps a bit overwhelmed by this massive career acceleration it became clear that he needed to put out a debut artist album fast. With expectations being sky high after his quality single productions and being pressed for time because of the aforementioned bizarre travel schedule this obviously was not an easy nut to crack. Yet he finished it and didn’t fall for the temptation to recycle his former releases but instead came up with all new tracks. So let’s press play and see what he made of it:

01. Stars
In between the loads and loads of generic garbage the dance music scene has been flooded with in the past few years Gareth Emery and Jerome Isma-ae are two of the best examples of new producers that deserve massive respect for their unique styles.

This track is a magical fusion between the Emery and the Isma-ae sound, which totally works for me. Really excellent track.

9/10

02. El Segundo
Well well, El Segundo. I know a guy who left his wallet there once, but that’s a long time ago. In the meantime this is a pretty nice piece of work, although sequenced right after the powerful ‘Stars’ track it lacks a bit of umpf. Still an album full of tracks like this would make me a happy consumer.

8/10

03. Too dark tonight
Hmz, this one is seriously lame. Even though working with your sibling from another genre is not entirely original (Eller van Buuren anyone?) I think as such it is a cool idea, but the result is a disappointing track. Unworthy of the album.

03/10

04. Arrival
Gareth immediately recuperates here with this track he opened almost every set with this summer. This is really one of the strongest tracks on the album and one of his strongest productions ever I might add. While it sounds actually quite simple it has a massive drive and all the great Emery ingredients. I experienced the effect of this track live a few times and it’s just the perfect set opener. Progressive, yet driving and setting you up for more.

9/10

05. Into the light
Not really into this one. In general I’m not a fan of vocal tracks, so I always try to listen beyond the vocal, imagining an instrumental version. In this case that leaves a decent but not great track, which I would rate with a 7 perhaps, but with the vocal I have to deduct. A very similar situation as with various tracks on Armin’s new album.

5/10

06. Full tilt
This is getting better again. Nice typical album track, nothing particularly special but pleasant on the ears.

7/10

07. Sanctuary
The single track that preceded the album and a great example of the smartness of the Emery sound. It really balances between trance, progressive and house which makes it a great fit in any set, and it’s really hard not to like it. Also a great use of vocal in this one, it’s nicely executed and actually adds body to the track. The only point of criticism I could think of is that right before the track gets into the chorus that annoying buzzing sound sample that Gareth also used before in his ‘On a good day’ remix is back. This sound makes me think my speakers are blown all the time. Nevertheless really liking this one. Had he put the club mix in here it would have been a 9.

8/10

08. Citadel
Great instrumental track. If only the entire album was like this it would be heavenly.

8/10

09. Fight the sunrise
The number of vocal tracks is getting rather annoying at this point. And not being a particularly good one this just doesn’t add anything. It’s too simple, the structure is borderline generic deggadegga uplifting and the vocal is seriously nagging. Will probably fit perfectly in the second hour of A State of Trance and therefore will not make it into my iPod.

4/10

10. All is now
Failed crossbreed between Emery and generic uplifting. At least it’s instrumental but as much as the collaboration with Jerome Isma-Ae did work, this one with Activa just doesn’t. Not really working very well as an album closer either as it doesn’t really leave you with any particular feeling.

5/10

As seems to be the trend nowadays CD buyers get screwed over by getting an incomplete product, compared to the digital download buyers who get bonus tracks. Let’s see what us CD heads are missing out on:

11. I will be the same
This should have been called ‘I will be the shame’. Poor track and very poor vocal. Which is rather odd, since Emma Hewitt is one of the best singers around atm.

3/10

12. Global
Absolutely great track and an even more absolute shame that this is only a digital bonus and is not on the CD. This instead of ‘Too dark tonight’ or ‘Fight the sunrise’ would have boosted the quality of the album significantly.

8/10

13. On a Metropolis day
Big tripple meh on this one. I’m not a fan of mashups to begin with, and even though technically this one is well executed it basically wastes two tracks that were already great by themselves. The worst part however is that every Tom, Dick and Harry DJ plus Gareth himself have been playing this thing to utter death all year long and if I hear it one more time I’m gonna puke. For real. I am sooo done with this mashup and besides being totally misplaced on Anjunabeats Volume 8 it now needs to pop up once again here. Blegh, meh and what else.

Not rated/10

In conclusion
Becoming a really popular DJ may seem cool and glamorous, but in reality it’s not an easy thing. In fact it puts immense pressure on you, because your crowd suddenly changes from just underground lovers who can ID every track you play to masses of people who come to see you mainly because they heard your name mentioned on MTV and are not primarily there out of love for the music. Once you get into the DJ Mag Top 10 your crowds will convert to 90% of this type of people and except maybe when your name is Deadmau5 and you really don’t give a fuck you will feel the pressure of going for tried and tested safe tracks and loads of recognizable vocals. Plus if you don’t endlessly keep on playing your own hits the masses will still think your set sucked.

I’ve heard Gareth perform in multiple occasions this year and unfortunately the signs of his sets turning into the typical superstar DJ ones are bright and clear. And although I still vastly prefer hearing him over Armin, Tiesto, Ferry or Van Dyk I can’t help but wanting to run when he gets On a Metropolis day or Lethal industry out for the umptieth time. I know he has to, but I hate it. In this light the collection of songs on this artist album doesn’t surprise me one bit. Too many vocal tracks and definitely no risky experiments. The average rating came out at 6.6, which is right there with my thoughts of Armin’s and Markus’ new albums. All three of them share the same hit and miss selection of really cool and rather meh tracks. The cool ones are seriously cool in this case, but gawd do I hate DJ Mag.

Armin van Buuren changes name of radio show

After the surprising decision by Dutch event powerhouse ID&T to rename their long running event ‘Trance Energy’ into just ‘Energy’ Armin van Buuren has followed suit this week and announced that effective immediately he will rename his world famous radio show ‘A State Of Trance’ to just ‘A State Of’.

“I get a lot of emails from people asking me why I play so many tracks that are not trance in my radio show”, the world famous DJ explains. “The reason is that there are many styles of music that can get me in a state of trance, and that is why I play them in my show. I can get into deep trance when listening to VanVelzen for example. Or when I write pop songs with producers that worked with world famous super stars, so I can mention having worked with them in every single interview I do. That is what really gets me in a state of trance. Actually I can’t wait to work with people like Lady Gaga or Beyonce, man that would be so awesome. I’m getting in a state of trance just thinking about that!”

Van Buuren, who is currently said to be in close competition with the ultimate cheese dance master David Guetta for the number 1 spot in the 2010 edition of the DJ Mag Top 100 poll, admits that he’s getting pretty tired of having to explain himself constantly. “Those trance lovers just don’t get it. They expect me to play trance music, just because the radio show is called A State Of Trance. I really don’t understand what they are so upset about. There is so much more great music than just trance. The other day I was in the studio working with a guy that used to have a neighbor who was the nephew of a guy who was in high school with Justin Timberlake. I mean, wow!

I hope that with this new name we can finally put the past behind us and that everybody will understand that we need progression, which means developing trance music into everything that it is not”.

It is unclear at this time whether Van Buuren will also reset his episode numbering back to 001 and if so what effect this will have on the current planning of events celebrating the 500th episode of his radio shows in early 2011.

Review: Armin van Buuren - Mirage

In retrospect Armin’s 2008 album Imagine clearly marked a turning point in his career. After reaching the number 1 spot in the DJ Mag competition in late 2007 he obviously smelled the big money and like Tiesto and Guetta did before him he decided to branch out to the immensely huge amount of people populating the area between the real underground dancefloors and the pop charts, leaving his long term fans in complete confusion.

A strategy that obviously worked out fine in terms of his bank account, but also at times made him the laughing stock of an ever increasing part of his former loyal crowd. Three years later the results are clear. Walk into any Armin gig and you will see a lost soul doing 50 Jesus poses and gay heart signs per hour to a massive crowd of people you have never seen before, who think that and endless stream of completely unoriginal and generic deggadegga crap makes for the perfect trance gig and that the 27th mashup with ‘In and out of love’ at the end is the best tune ever conceived by mankind.

Unfortunately old fools like myself can cry wolf and stand on our heads all we want. The new Armin has emerged and he’s here to stay. The new Armin that is no longer a real DJ but an act, like a pop band. Traveling the world day in day out doing the exact same live set, with the exact same tunes and the exact same moves to the exact same crowd, whether it be in California, Tokyo or Appelscha. Crowds consisting of endless amounts of people who adore him like some God like being, worship the ground he walks on and will eat anything he serves them, no matter if it’s interesting and new or recycled for the umptieth time.

When artists get this popular a new album is more than anything a chance to show the world a new direction. You might run the risk of being completely misunderstood at first, but might prove to have made history later. The alternative is to stay with the tried and trusted formula of mixing some danceable stuff with a good dose of fluffy tralala trance, which will pretty much guarantee continuation of current popularity, fame and money. Soooo… let’s see what he chose to do and press play:

01. Desiderium 207
Well this is one awesome opening track. Susana doing Enya. As usual with her tracks it’s either hit or miss and this is a total hit in my book. Very well executed and such a surprise. I love unexpected opening tracks on dance albums and this is as good as it gets. Desiderium is Latin for ‘desire’ (well obviously :D), but I can’t place the 207. Maybe Susana fancies buying a Peugeot 207 from her cut?

9/10

02. Mirage
Desiderium slowly transforms into this second track, one of the Mirage tracks Armin has been slipping into his live sets during the summer and definitely one of the highlights of this album. It showcases those typical Armin style buildups and breakdowns, the real classical strings fit excellent and the guitar parts Eller did actually border on hardrock. Nice :) We’re off to a great start here.

8/10

03. This light between us
But just like on Imagine after a good start almost immediately Armin completely derails and starts cranking out useless pop tunes. Here’s the first one. Simple breakbeat arrangement, big, echoy over the top vocals. Yawn. Could just as well be a Tiesto production and that is not exactly a compliment these days.

4/10

04. Not giving up on love
Already out as a second single before the album came out, with this track Armin hits a new low, right down there with Tiesto and Guetta, who have turned making the same style fluffy top 40 aimed tralala crap into an art form. Will undoubtedly win him another million new fans but it’s quite clear why he had remixes made for his sets. It’s just too embarrassing to play live. Never thought I’d see the day when a Dash Berlin remix actually beats the original. A few weeks after the single release he came up with a remix of his own as well, which actually sounds better than this original mix, but still is one of his weakest productions of the year. So yes ladies and gentlemen, we have a new ‘Going wrong’ and I’m afraid Armin is gonna torture us with this is his sets for the next 2 years straight, including at least 15 different mashups using the vocals.

3/10

05. I don’t own you
After hearing the previews this was one of the tracks that I found disappointing but hearing it in full made me change my mind. Pretty decent track actually, not exactly groundbreaking in terms of structure but the arrangements are nice and the minimal application of vocal bits are the cherry on the cake, like they were in ‘Face to face’ and ‘Rain’ on the Imagine album. The perfect way to use vocals in trance in my opinion.

8/10

06. Full focus
When this track came out as a forerunner single it gave many of us high hopes for this album. Great drive, cool electro bleeps and fits in the blueprint of his two recent Gaia tracks and remixes, which I also really like. So more of these please.

8/10

07. Take a moment
But after picking up with two nice tracks for a second time we get pushed off a cliff. What a plain right horrible track this is. The contrast to Full focus could not be any bigger and I cannot for the life of me imagine that Josh Gabriel was involved with this childish piece of crap. Even Roger Shah, who is the undisputed king of cheesy tunes, would probably be embarrassed by this. Absolutely horrible, worst track on the album.

2/10

08. Feels so good
Another utterly boring Eurodance track, promoting infidelity. This belongs on a Sugarbabes album or something teeny bop like that. Total blegh.

3/10

09. Virtual friend
This is obviously Mirage’s ‘Fine without you’, except better. It’s one of the tracks that marks Armin’s desire to make diverse albums and in that way adds to the incoherence that characterizes them. But on the other hand it’s a very Armin-ish track with a rollercoaster flow and in that sense I can appreciate it. Unfortunately the vocals don’t do the track any good. The lyrics are really moody and as such fit rather well, but the way they are mixed in (too loud) and timed (too early) make the end result rather meh. I know I say this often, but this time it’s more applicable than ever: an instrumental version of this track would be much better.

6/10

10. Drowning
This one I find rather okay. At least it’s a lot better than all the vocal goop we heard so far. The rhythm and flow reminds me of the Dutch band Total Touch, also because the singer has a similar voice. The vocals are actually very well executed and contrary to ‘Virtual friend’ they really complement the track. Third Armin track this year with the siren style buildup/breakdown but he still gets away with it. Unfortunately the rather unexpected album edit ending really hurts here.

7/10

11. Down to love
Another okay track here. Loads of Gaia sounds in this one, which is a good thing in my book. Once again I would probably prefer an instrumental version, but the vocals are quite minimalistic, which makes them okay.

7/10

12. Coming home
If you listen closely you will hear that this track is a mixture of recycled sound bits from ‘Imagine’, ‘Face to face’ and ‘Intricacy’ from the previous album. And since those are actually my three favorite tracks on there one would expect this to be top. Unfortunately I didn’t find it great at all, because the main structure of the song is the standard blueprint of current uber boring generic uplifting trance. The clever re-engineering of successful Imagine sounds cannot hide that.

What I totally don’t get though is why the intro of ‘Take a moment’ wasn’t used in this track instead. I mean it’s clearly the sound of somebody arriving in his car, walking the path to the front door, opening it and dropping the keys on the table, in other words somebody coming home. That intro has nothing to do with the track it is used in now, and would have made total sense in this one. Oh well.

6/10

13. These silent hearts
Many DJ’s rave about this BT guy but to be honest I still fail to see what all the fuss is about. He did some cool stuff, but for me not everything he comes up with is pure gold, like so many seem to think. This track is a good example of that as well. It has a nice main melody and some very cool classic trance elements and as such I think I actually prefer it over Coming home, but the vocals are just total meh. Track has great remix potential though. Cut out the vocals entirely, fix the generic bits and it could be an awesome end of set banger. But this version doesn’t do it for me.

6/10

14. Orbion
Now this is a great track again, definitely one of my favorites on the album. Structure wise rather similar to Full focus, but more trancy. This is the 2010 Armin the way I like to hear him most.

9/10

15. Minack
I don’t know anybody who wasn’t over the moon when word came out that Armin was doing another collab with Ferry. Even more surprising is the outcome, an initially very weird tune but once you get into it one of the best ones on the album. It’s also very, very, very clearly a Ferry production, actually I have a hard time discovering any bits that Armin might have made. Maybe he came up with that weird rhythm shift, because that is actually very un-Ferry-ish.

9/10

16. Youtopia
This one is a bit of a grower. At first it sounds as out of place as the other pop tracks on the album but on second listen it turns out to be a really nice pop track. Great melody, nice lyrics and the overall feeling is just very loving. And in that way I guess it works well as an end track, because it leaves you with a smile.

8/10

So there you have the 16 tracks that make up the regular CD version of Mirage. Now originally this was the part where I would be ranting about Armada ripping off their CD buying customers by releasing bonus tracks only as a part of the full iTunes download album, but to my surprise I found out that 2 weeks before the release date Free Record Shop announced the release of a limited edition 2CD version that includes all the bonus tracks. So thumbs up for that, although it won’t necessarily do people abroad any good.

At this point I still wondered why Armin didn’t make Mirage a double album to begin with. Apparently he made enough tracks to fill 2 CD’s. Personally I love double albums, actually some of my favorite albums of all time are doubles, like Prince’s ‘Sign of the times’, Earth Wind and Fire’s ‘Faces’ and Electric Light Orchestra’s ‘Out of the blue’.

Anyway, let’s listen to those bonus tracks:

17. Breathe in deep
This track is a total carbon copy of Gaia 'Aisha', except now with vocals. Ripping off other people’s tunes is the hip thing to do nowadays in trance, but Armin brings it to the next level and simply rips off his own tune. I like the ahhh ahhhh Enya style vocal arrangement, and I like 'Aisha', but the useless and poppy vocals kinda ruin it and it wasn’t very original to begin with.

6/10

18. Take me where I wanna go
OMG! If you agreed with me that ‘Take a moment’ was the lowpoint of this project than you haven’t heard this one. I never would have expected this but Armin actually managed to make an even cheesier VanVelzen track than 'Broken tonight'. He deserves a Golden Gnome Award for that, because that is quite an achievement. Uber boring track with mega fail vocal. As the Dutch would say: Mag ik een teiltje?

1/10

19. I surrender
Yawnnnnn. Another very uninspired and boring track and the umtieth variation on the standard tralala uplifting theme.

3/10

20. Love too hard
This is what you get when you try to hard to be a pop star. Terrible.

3/10

21. Virtual friend (acoustic mix)
I think the vocals come out much better in this acoustic version. Nice to listen to but completely out of place on this album. Better save it for ‘Mirage Unplugged’, which could be a great idea to milk some more sales out of the project in 2012 after the sales of all the album versions, all the singles and ‘Mirage Remixed’ have died out.

Not rated/10

Conclusions
My main beef with this album is that I was expecting a lot more in terms of collabs and stand out tunes. Armin is always ranting in interviews that his #1 status opens doors to working with big artists that otherwise would never be accessible for him, but I still wonder what artists he actually means by that. Ana Criado? The world famous Laura V? Superstar Chris Jones? VanVelzen perhaps? Working with the guy who was the neighbor of the guy whose nephew served coffee in the studio where Robbie Williams once worked is not all that special imo. Okay I might be exaggerating here regarding Guy Chambers, but my point is when you keep saying stuff like that I expect collaborations with Seal to actually happen. Or with Jean-Michel Jarre. Or Quicy Jones. Or Nile Rogers. Or Giorgio Moroder. Or Underworld. Or Daft Punk. Or Chris Martin. Or Robbie Williams himself for that matter. I think Armin is too easily impressed when working for example with someone like BT, when in reality it's BT who should be impressed by getting a chance to work with Armin and getting exposure he could never dream of achieving just by himself.

So... is Mirage Imagine Part II? Well, yes and no. Yes in terms of unimpressive collaborations but in many ways I find it to be more similar to Markus Schulz’ recent artist album. It has the exact same completely incoherent mix of hit and miss tracks, with no buildup or flow as a whole, and it is very obviously designed to please as wide an audience as possible. So in that sense the average rating of 6.4 that I came up with doesn’t really surprise me to be honest. Mind you that rating is based on the official 16 tracks, because that is how Armin defined the album to be released on CD worldwide. And judging by the awful quality of the bonus tracks I think in hindsight he made a very wise decision there.

As with Markus’ album, cramming 16 tracks into 80 minutes means having to resort to album edits, which sortof reduces the consumer value of this release for the die hard fans, since most of them prefer full length versions and now will have to wait and see if those ever even get released. On the other hand, had Armin gone for a 10 track selection out of the 16 he had left (like he did on Imagine), then I’m quite sure he would have axed some of the tracks that I like the most in favor of the ones I dislike. So because of the album edits Mirage actually offers more good tracks than Imagine, notwithstanding that the not-so-good tracks actually hit an absolute new low. And since the problem with Imagine was that Armin kept releasing it’s cheesy vocal tracks as singles and playing them in his sets till the cows came home while in comparison never ever playing the good ones, I’m afraid we are up for more of the same in the upcoming 2 years.

Update
After a few weeks I have slightly altered my opinion about some of the tracks, so time for a little update.

09. Virtual friend
I’m still finding the vocals equally meh, but the base track itself is getting cooler by the day. Many people have already noticed, this production just oozes Gabriel & Dresden and that is always a compliment, especially since they weren’t involved at all. Still points deducted for the vocal, but nevertheless going up to 7/10.

10. Drowning
This track is getting tiresome really fast. I’m downgrading it to 5/10.

13. These silent hearts
Another grower. I’m sticking with my original comments, but I’ve heard this on a big club system now and it sounded pretty tight. It also really brought atmosphere to the party. Gonna upgrade this one to 7/10.